Well.. Here I am again.. re-open a blog I once created just to forget a guy.. 1 other (random) guy.. In which makes me realise that... I've been through quite alot of heartbreaks.. and I'm not even sure which is the one that really broke my heart. I was sad, angry, devastated because I was really heartbroken or... just too stubborn and pathetic to admit that I can't keep a guy?
Hi! I'm Junghye (alias), 32 years old, divorced, from a city full of lights, hidden sex & $$$. Have a family, just like the show "The Godfathers" (described by an ex in-law), complicated, full of zest and all tryin to show loves in all kind of differents and crazy ways. Mind me, in my family, Crazy = Insane. Sanity is definetely not in anyone of our dictionery. Slogging my life right now in a industry that the country are fighting for. Everyones needs 'it'. Some even started a war with the hidden reason of wanting 'it'. Studied a totally different industry though. A tiny little wages that cannot even fullfill my loves for food. Tagging along, a boy who practically has the whole of my heart and soul that I'm too scared to have him by my side. Not too cool yah?
Well, I got my inspiration to have this "column" from seeing too much (I believe) of Sex and the City. Maybe I'm trying to be a "Miranda" though hoping to have the life of "Samantha", wishing to be like "Charlotte" and eventually, truely wants to be a "Carrie". And after season 2 ep 8, I start to wonder, "Would I feel better, think clearer, be happier, if I put all my thoughts down, non-verbally?
I cannot express myself very well, verbally. As I grow older, I started to think too much, bother too much on how I express myself to others. Did I speak clearly? Was the words clear? Isit undersandable? Did I use my words rightly? What about my grammar? Do I sound stupid? Pronouncation? Blah blah blah...! Continously goes through my mind... Unbelievable... And then... I got distracted. By other unimportant matters.. Or maybe, what goes through my mind is as unimportant. I do not know. What is important and what is not? How do you actually defien that? Who defines it? You? Me? Father? Sister? O.. the MOTHERS? Brothers? or friends?
Too many, too much, too distracted, too confused, to complicated.. from here, I'm just gonna put all that down and straighten it up as it goes. Anyone onboard with me?
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